This verse has popped into my head over and over and over again since we've been here. I read it in my devotions last week, and it's stuck with me ever since. It reads:
"For he will deliver the needy who cry out,
the afflicted who have no one to help.
He will take pity on the weak and needy
and save the needy from death.
He will rescue them from oppression and violence,
for precious is their blood in his sight."
The last part of the last verse is what gets me every time: For precious is their blood in his sight."
A lot of us having been talking this week about how leaving feels very bittersweet. We're all so excited to go home because we're exhausted and pretty much at our wits end. But then we see one of the kids in the orphanage, or we play with the street kids, and then we feel like there's no way we can leave. I journaled a lot about it today, and I was talking to God about how hard it is for me to deal with the fact that I have to leave those kids. I saw Adrian today after school, and it was probably one of the best parts of my week. I was walking home from school after a not spectacular day, feeling kind of down about the week in general. I saw him from a distance, but I didn't think he was going to see me. He looked at me and gave me this look like he was trying to figure me out. I kind of hunched down and made a "oh my goodness I'm so excited to see you" face, and he gave one right back. His face lit up, and he literally sprinted towards me and jumped into my arms. I carried him to the gate of our house, and put him down and told him I would come back. Unfortunately, it's been raining all afternoon and evening. And not just light rain...the hardest downpour I've ever seen in my life. Which means...no street kids today. :( I was feeling really down about it, so I decided to make a slideshow on iMovie of all of my pictures of the street kids. I was putting music to it and was almost in tears. I hate hate HATE that I have to leave them on Saturday. I hate that I most likely will never see any of those kids ever again. I hate that I have no idea whether or not the next team that comes in will pay any attention to them. But I've learned that I just need to trust. I need to trust that God has a plan for me, and if I'm supposed to come back here at some point in my life, I will. I need to trust that God will keep his hand on those kids, I need to trust that he will keep them safe and taken care of, and I need to trust that he will bring people into their lives to love on them. It's going to be so so so so hard to leave them. Whenever I think about it, I get a lump in my throat and I have to fight back tears. I just have to make sure that tomorrow and/or Saturday when I see them, to tell them how much I love them in the best Tagalog I can muster. Prayer for strength at the end of this week would be wonderful. :)
As for school, I'm pretty much done! Tomorrow we'll be visiting Faith Academy, which is a really big MK school - one of the biggest in the world I think. It's definitely going to be interesting, and we'll be spending a lot of our school day there. So if I go to school at all tomorrow, it'll only be for about an hour or so. Friday is our last day, and the teachers at Valley View are throwing us this big party that they have been planning for a few weeks now. We all have to say a little something in Tagalog, which they suggested that we have memorized. Wish me luck!
I'm definitely excited to come home, as hard as it will be. If you could pray for strength and God's protection, as all of us are pretty much starting to combust. We've had a couple girls get sick, everyone is tired, and things are definitely getting harder as our trip starts to come to a close. I've appreciated all of your prayers and support this month - it means so much!
Love and miss you all,
Kristen
"To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, 'If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.'" (John 8:31-32)
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